My Extraordinary Guru

Guru purnima or Vyasa purnima is celebrated to express our gratitude and respect towards our gurus, our teachers. Gurus are those evolved beings who selflessly enlighten us and guide us throughout our journey.

I am blessed with many such wonderful gurus throughout my entire journey. My parents, my brother, my school and college teachers, my neighbors, my close friends and relatives have all been my strong support system and my mentors all throughout and I am so grateful to each one of them.

Since i started writing this blog i have been waiting for this opportunity to write about my wonderful guru: my Sir who has played a pivotal role in shaping not only my career but also my personality. Today I felt it was the best time to express my feelings.

Around 13 years back, I was participating in an educational program for preschoolers as a part of my post graduation studies. Dr. Umesh Vaidya - a well known pediatrician in Pune was our chief guest. After the entire program, I carefully listened to his speech and I clearly remember how awestruck I was! 😯 I had thought to myself that "he seems like such a pleasant and humble being and what a wonderful and knowledgeable orator. My seniors are really lucky to have gotten an opportunity to work with him and learn from him."

Six months later I ended up interning at the same hospital and at the same unit which was headed by Dr. Vaidya. From there the journey of learning something, that was completely new for me, had initiated. Within no time I fell in love with the unit and the work. Working for small pre-term babies and helping moms, started bringing me so much satisfaction and peace that I decided this is what I wanted to make a career in.

Dr. Vaidya (whom I would be referring as 'Sir' in rest of the article) has always been such a busy doctor. He has a really tight schedule, packed up IPDs and OPDs and lot of administrative work that he voluntarily takes care of. He is so punctual, extremely dedicated and works really hard to provide optimal care to his patients.

All these years, every morning me n my colleagues would attend his patient rounds at sharp 9 am and every afternoon his counselling sessions. The rounds would be filled with academic and practical knowledge and the counselling sessions would be filled with that knowledge which none of the books could have ever provided us.

Right from the way Sir greeted and received his patients inside the counselling room, to the crystal clear counselling which answers all important concerns and queries that the patients have, that too in a limited time. I am so impressed, every time I observe his work and get to learn something new from him every single day. Patients who would enter the room crying would leave the room laughing away to glory and this change would happen within a matter of minutes.

When I had decided to take up lactation counselling as a profession he had to strive really hard to convince the hospital management and all the doctors about our importance. He indeed has always been such a foresighted person. A visionary, who knew that nutritionists had a very important role to play in the NICU since human milk feeding and breastfeeidng is the very first nutrition for any baby and its lifelong benefits is something that everyone is well aware of.

Sir cares for everyone around him. He looks after the comfort and betterment of all his students, doctors, colleagues, paramedics and all the nursing staff in whichever way possible. He never denies help to any person who comes to him with any sort of complaints.

As years passed by, the bond between sir and me, kept getting stronger. He didn't only support me with my career but also guided me at various phases of my life. Whenever I felt lost and requested his advice, he would always listen to me patiently, provide balanced perspective and give rock solid support without forcing any of his views and expectations on me. He has always given importance to the opinions of all of his students while managing patients. He believes that there is no age limit to learning and never fails to find time for teaching his students.

I was this clueless, introvert girl who was not very confident about her own abilities back then and Sir kept trusting me with so many responsibilities, encouraging me whole heartedly even for my miniscule successes. He is the perfect example of practice what you preach and he always leads by his own example. He is an epitome of humility and has taught me how to enjoy small joys of life.

He has been a teacher, a mentor and a guide to innumerable students like me and even he doesn't realize how much he has impacted our lives.On occasion of Guru purnima I wish my sir wonderful health and express my heartfelt gratitude for all that he has done for me. 🙏🏻🙏🏻 💐💐

He has not only inspired me to work sincerely but also to spread my knowledge and work without expectations. He taught me to be ambitious but also remain grounded and learn to count all my blessings. 😊😊

One extra day after death please!

Recently the entire country was shook with the news of sudden demise of a talented young actor - Sushant Singh Rajput. I have watched few of his films. I did consider him a good actor, even a better dancer since, I had seen him dance really well, in the reality dance show - Jhalak Dikhlaja.

When I saw the news I was shocked like everyone else and really sad too. The first thought that occured to my mind was 'Why'? Why would an actor, who is at the peak of his career give up on his life? 

The entire social media was flooded with messages from everyone about how sad they felt, condolence messages and how everyone now wants to talk about mental health. There were posts stating, they are all available at any time for a conversation, in case anyone is considering taking our lives.

Well, I was overwhelmed with emotions too and I started watching his videos, his songs, his dance videos over and over again. When I watched few of his interviews, I saw a side of him which, I had never known till now. 

He had a difficult journey to stardom. He was an introvert in the beginning and he had learned a lot of things all these years, out of which, he shared a few with the students from IIT in one of his talk. It amazed me to see that, he had such clarity of thoughts and how much he knew about himself and what he was looking for in life.

He said, " When I was young, money was a big differentiator for me. I thought life was unfair because I cannot buy the things I want! I lacked the money that I could not even think I would be able to make, at that point in time. For me happiness was something I always associated with the future. I wanted to earn a lot and buy all the big things and become happy. Today I have fame, I have success, I have money but now it just doesn't seem to make any difference! Now, when I look back I feel that, it were those 'small' things in the past which were actually the 'BIG' things! He said he now understood that 'Money+recognition' wasn't equivalent to happiness for him. It was 'Now (present) + excitement' that he had been looking for all the time. He received it only while he was on the sets through his acting. That is really deep thinking and understanding about life.

I have been listening patiently and reading through all different opinions on the suicide and mental health over last few days. Well, I am a very good listener and here are few things I wish to share. 

I felt that it is a good thing that people are talking about mental health and want to help others. But again, the question remains will a person on the verge of giving up actually ping you on facebook or whatsapp and tell you that he is on the 10th floor of his balcony, just waiting to jump and wanted to see if you could convince him otherwise? 

I also read posts of people saying, "How can he commit suicide? It is such an act of cowardness!" According to me, it takes a hell lot of guts to jump off the 14th floor or hang ourselves till we die of suffocation or shoot ourselves in the head. I will never do that in my right senses! Why does it have to be labeled as being a 'coward'? 

I read a post by a friend, where a famous psychologist has explained it really well. He says "people who commit suicide, choose death when they feel living is worse than being alive. It is not like they don't appreciate life or they are not scared of dying. But, dying seems less scarier to them than living. He gave an example of why people choose to jump from the building which has caught fire. They are indeed afraid of jumping from that height but, somehow when the flames come closer, jumping from the building and dying seems less scarier to them than burning alive.

One of my friend was really irritated about this sudden love for the actor on social media. He said "Not everyone with a WhatsApp account, is a psychologist!" He thought, most of the posts were more about seeking attention than about the actor! Well, initially I thought he was being little judgemental. Many people might be genuinely feeling sad! But, something he said really made me ponder. He said "If someone in our family or a close friend, commits suicide, would we be posting it or his/her pics on Social media? Then why do that with a celebrity?" It did make sense, Sushant is not alive, he is not there to give any explanation or reasons and his family is hurting bad. So why not just let him go and let the family grieve in peace.

My brother had a completely different take, he said "Why is everyone feeling bad? Sushant has made his decision out of his own free-will. Maybe, that is what he wanted! Not because he was depressed or having a very difficult time but maybe because, he thought he has lived his life well, he has served his purpose and there is nothing more left for him! While everyone has a right to live, then, why not the right to die too?"

So, I received so many different perspectives from different people! Lot of these conversations, made me really think and contemplate and here is what i think.

It is evident from many of the posts from Sushant's celebrity friends/colleagues that most of them are feeling extremely guilty as to why they were not there for him and not in touch and why they could not save him. We will never know if anything could have changed whatever happened. I cannot be there for everyone! But yes, I can definitely try to be there for someone - my close ones. I may not protect them all the time. But, I can be a part of their life and support them! Life and death may not be in my control but, taking out some time for my dear ones, sure is! I am noone to judge why someone chose to die, but I can try to learn something from the life they lived! I am not a psychologist or an expert so, if someone needs any sort of help dealing with his/her personal challenges, the best I can do is try and be a patient listening ear and try to convince that person to seek professional help. 

I always felt that, if God would ask me for my last wish, I will tell him "I need an extra day on earth after I die. When I can be invisible and I could just hear the things that people would say because that is apparently the only time when everyone praises you whole-heartedly." I myself don't wish to wait till 'that day' to say good things to someone, to praise someone or share my genuine opinion, about things that matter to someone. I would want to express my real feelings and boost someone's self-confidence as early as I can! Life is so unpredictable, noone knows how much long, we or anyone else we dearly love has. Nor do we know for sure, if we get that extra day after we die. So if you wanna say something or get in touch with a long lost friend, 'NOW' is the right time!

What the lockdown 2020 has taught me

Someone told me "I am bored to death coz of lockdown.
There is no life, no interaction, no fun, no frown
It seems like life has stopped and I am caged!
Seems like time is stuck, i feel helpless and aged".
"What about you? " he questioned. "How are u coping?
Dont u wish this nightmare would soon be ending??"

"Well, frankly speaking" I said, "I would definitely  want this to end.
I would want us to be working and would love to meet my friends."
I wish that everyone is safe, secure and healthy
And go back to their routines asap and live normally.
But no! I am not unhappy nor am I bored
This is a much needed break and I am happy life has paused.

We drive ourselves crazy, chasing our big dreams.
We keep working relentlessly, it is more damaging than it seems."
This pandemic might have stressed us and turned our lives upside down
But its really made me reflect and shown me a path I've never known
It taught me that there is very little, that we need to be happy.
Like getting to spend this long due, quality time with my family.

This realization that you have a beautiful life and so many people who care for you
Who are there to support and lift your mood whenever you're feeling blue.
It taught me that you can be happiest in your own company, when you listen to your heart.
We have been procrastinating on so many of our passions and may be, now is the time to start!

You might be a workaholic, really passionate about your job but what can I say!
Being hard working and ambitious isn't bad but sometimes work can wait another day.
You might be an important asset to your company and maybe a project was dependent on you
But no, they won't shut down nor stop functioning if u miss one important meeting or a few.

It made me go back to my creative side, which I had lost somewhere in this rat race.
It brought me close to my long lost friends, and let my life self pace.
It made me realize how much my mind needed healing n my body needed rest.
I didnt even know that I could cook, paint, stitch and had a million other interests.

The food cravings and the late night parties might be missed but, simple, home cooked food is all that our body needs.
We can keep our loved ones happy and far from dreaded anxiety attacks, if its only positivity that we feed.
Yes we all can manage quite well, without a long day of hopping multiplexes, beauty salon trips and shopping.
Dont underestimate the small joys of life! A warm cup of coffee, with our favourite book or binge watching on Netflix can be equally entertaining.

We thought money and luxuries was very important but now we know, peace of mind and good health is everything.
We thought life was measured by the fame, but now we know, being helpful to someone in times of distress, is what gives life its true meaning.
                                        -Rashmi Poduval